the miseducation of patrick dunn
Patrick currently resides deep in the suburbs of Boston, Massachusetts. He sucks at sports, can't play any musical instruments, and suffers from crippling anxiety. In his spare time, he can be found trying to beat his best friend's score at Ms. Pacman or passed out on the couch after a tiring day of Law & Order: SVU reruns. His favorite things include television, music, and comedy. He dislikes almost everything else, especially the Tori episodes of Saved by the Bell.
A business major watches Transformers: Dark of the Moon and wonders who is going to pay for the clean up after the Decepticons seized and destroyed the city of Chicago. Thousands of relief workers are sure to get sick after inhaling toxic dust and handling other hazardous debris, such as asbestos, lead, and mercury. The price of proper protective equipment is not cheap and just think of the lawsuits that are bound to spring up over the next decade and beyond.
“This is the worst fictional disaster on American soil since the Scarecrow released his fear gas into the streets of Gotham City,” said Rahm Emanuel, incumbent mayor of Chicago, who casually is forgetting about the angry space cloud thing from Green Lantern and the alien invasion of Battle: Los Angeles; where relief workers are still scrambling to get Hollywood back into shape in time for the 84th Academy Awards.
The discovery of a 1.8 ton World War II era bomb in the German city of Koblenz has caused officials to call for the evacuation of around 45,000 residents — nearly half of the city’s total population of 106,000 — while emergency crews work to defuse the British aerial mine.
The mandatory evacuation, which includes two hospitals, seven elderly care homes and a local prison, is the largest in a German city since the end of the war, according to Der Spiegel.
The bomb was found in the Rhine River after an unusually dry fall caused water levels to decline, and officials expect to find more unexploded bombs in the coming days.
Meanwhile, back at stately Wayne Manor - Holy haberdashery, Batman! I haven’t seen a bomb that big since Cutthroat Island!
The best thing about owning a dog is that they are not children. I still get that satisfaction of caring for another life form but don’t have to pretend to support any weird habits or annoying hobbies that comes with having a child. I’m sure my parents went through hell when I insisted on dressing up like the Jack Nicholson version of the The Joker on a daily basis and terrorizing my neighborhood as the clown prince of crime.
